Doubt has crossed my mind a lot lately. Whether what I am doing right now are the right choices, the right things that will ultimately lead me on the path to me not only living my own best possible life, but also improving the lives of others in the process. It is true, in a sense, that both of these intentions I have set for my life-living my own best possible life and improving the lives of authors-could be deemed as selfish, ego-driven desires on my part that I really have no reason to spout about. However, for me, I can’t help but fall back on the things I value-that is, living authentically and creatively appropriate as possible-and therefore living my own best life and helping others serve as the cornerstones of what I stand for in my existence.
However, when I look back on my own previous experiences, or other’s experiences-doubt was always there, lurking behind. Before I ever acted on stage before, I doubted that I had the guts to get up in front of a crowd of people and perform something where I was going to be judged-the thought terrified me and therefore I shied away from any formal type of acting training until circumstance thrust me into it. Oddly enough, the circumstance that led me there was actually due to the removal of me caring about another activity I had super high expectations for-playing baseball on the high school team-and therefore the leap into the void of acting was one that was likely more subconsciously driven yet met little resistance because the doubt I’d experienced earlier no longer held its power-it was definitely still there, but something more important was taking it’s place-the chance for me to finally prove myself after the expectation I had for a previous activity-baseball-had not been fulfilled (still love baseball though.)
I think this lesson can be transferred to any facet of life-and it follows one of my favorite quotes that is, “sometimes it isn’t about what the task or job is, it’s just about what is needed to be done.” I found this on a Meyers-Briggs personality website, and it resonates so much with me because it gets to the heart of the matter of motivation in terms of daily living. There isn’t any kind of concern with what other people think, with what my parents think, or what my dog thinks, It isn’t about what I think society expects from me, what my country thinks of me, or what the girl who works the front desk of the gym thinks of me-it’s literally about what needs to be done this very moment that is of upmost importance.
Doubt is something I’ve encountered a lot lately. I’ve wondered if I need to see outright success right away in order to validate the path I am on. Some signs of promise have been revealed through small, yet significant breakthroughs.
Doubt tests us in our most painful, darkest moments. How we respond to doubt reveals our true character. So, I challenge you to view doubt not as a detriment, but as a test to you that you really want whatever you are after in life. Know that you’ve got a friend here to help you along your way.
Funny Fearful Guy